Only if I can take "abortive herbs" afterwards!!

Townie driving by a Yale student giving a piggyback ride to another: Wanna get FUCKED like that?


--Broadway

Guy #2: Me too.

Guy #1: Dude, did you ever get a hemmeroid?
Guy #2: No, eww.
Guy #1: Dude, they're common. I read that half of everyone has had one. I wish I had had one when I met you.

The more meth-ey part.

Admissions Officer: Wait, Virginia has TWO states? I always thought that West Virginia simply referred to the western part of Virginia!


--Yale Admissions Office

Now we just hit the funnel.

The room is filled with a bunch of people in Yale gear.

Nurse: So, do you guys go to school around here?
Visiting friend: Nah. We go to the University of New Haven. Didn't quite hit the jackpot...


--Yale-New Haven Hospital

Victor Cezares!? Is that you?

Townie passing two Yale kids: Skull and Bones, skull and boners, I'LL BONE YA SISTER!


--Cross Campus

Break-up followed by numerous awkward interactions.

Asian girl 1: So what are your goals for next year?
Asian girl 2 (no hesitation): I'd really like to try a relationship.
(moments later)
Asian girl #1: You know, just a normal Yale relationship. Two students. And puppy love.


--Silliman Dining Hall

They like us! They really like us!

We got posted again on overheardeverywhere.com!

The artist as a young man would have learned to share.

Guy: What would happen if Barney wrote modernist novels?

A second one to carry my ignorance.

Yale Girl: You know how British people going to India in the 1800s had people dressing them...that's what I need. And an elephant. Or two.


--Saybrook

I can't wait until they put pictures of naked people on there.

Yale girl: Thank God for the internet...it's, like, amazing!


--Saybrook

I'm Jamie Lynn bitch! And my water done broke on your shins!

Townie: So you're Britney Spears, huh?
Yale Girl: ......No.


--Yale-New Haven Hospital

Dude, aren't you taking "Intro to Logic"

Taken from an athlete's reading notes: "Pg. 109-118 (this section is pretty much just a bunch of fucked up, trippy, hippy bullshit)"

Nice story, tell it again!

Guy: I haven't had an egg sandwich since that time I said "I'm not having any more egg sandwiches."


--OC

Buddah?

Girl: You look like yellow Jesus when you do that.


--Farnam

May 9th: Make Your Friends Feel Sexually Awkward Day (seriously)

Yale student #1: Why does *Sarah keep reminding us about May 9th?
Yale Student #2: Dude, because she wants our penises....penii...or...uhh.
Yale Student #1: Man, just say genitalias. It sounds better.


--Dining Hall

Asian-Americans: The Super Race

Girl (yelling): Hey! You! Your babies sounded great tonight.
Guy: Yeah... I wanted them to be mixed.


--Silliman Courtyard

Turns out napalm has a nice odor.

Guy: Today, I was walking somewhere, and it smelled like.... freedom. Delicious.


--Farnam

History, on the other hand, would just explode from huge egos.

History Professor: The discipline of mathematics would shrivel up and die if it depended on charismatic teaching.

Really? Can't I just marry rich?

Awkward professor (adorably sincere): Good luck! I hope you get a job!


--Film Studies Center

Plus it gives beejays!

CCL Drone #1: DUDE! Check it out! CCL Drone #2 and I made a dummy...
CCL Drone #2: ...so it can like, save us a spot in a booth!
Guy: Wow, guys.
CCL Drone #1: I have a pic on my phone! Wanna see
Guy: Uh...
CCL Drone #1: Look at his phone, dude!
Guy (after looking at phone): Ha. That's sweet actually.


--Trumbull Dining Hall

Woohoo!

Over 40,000 page-views! Celebrate by sending me your best Reading Week/Finals Overheards!

You guys are the best...no exaggeration.




Thanks for all the memories,
Joe

Anderson Cooper ain't no spring chicken.

Girl: So he just, like, became gay?
Guy: I didn't know it could take that long!
(Passing Gay Guy cackles)


--Saybrook

Now I just spend all my time in my office. Please knock.

Professor, in reference to the amount of porn on the internet: If I was a 14 year old boy today, I'd never leave my room.

--Anth Dept.

Gengis Kahn was a little bitch!

Professor: Fuck that guy!

--Anthro

Plus you ordered a gruyère scone.

Guy: You know how I know you're gay?... You blow me before brunch.



--Elm St.

Mr. Owl: "Let's find out....one, two, three. Three."

Woman: Did you know you can lose 25 calories just by kissing for 1 minute
Man: Wow, so if you kissed for four minutes, you could lose 100 calories
(they share a significant glance)
Woman: I wonder how many calories you lose by licking someone's face.

Just wait 'till we get to Moby Dick!

English Professor: "Man-juice!"


--LC

Does 'gay' mean what you think it means?'

Girl: Did you hear Sean* is gay?
Gay Guy: No way.... should I talk to him?
Girl: Wait, are you interested in him?
Gay Guy (after consideration): No... he's too happy.